I am thrown off step by worry; Like one who is given a stack of plates to carry, I stagger under what others have put in my arms and it is only a matter of time before I can bear no more weight and all come tumbling down.
Their broken shards will tear me as they have torn before; all the expectations of self, of others, of Him who I am terrified of disappointing.
They will nick and scar this frame, adding their marks to all the other reminders of how I have failed and not met the standard.
Cares and the mountains of opposition facing me, hem me in.
They roll like the waves of the deep ocean; when one is gone three more rise to take its place. I get my breath only to have this sea of discontent fill my mouth, stealing my praise of Elohim.
My friends are nimble winged eagles, they soar after Him with joy in their frames and grace and power follow wherever they alight.
They take the wings of the dawn and climb to the heavens, reflecting like diamonds the facets of His love to those here below.
I am undone.
What then shall I do? Who will rescue one as me? I have gone on my own and left the safety of the Presence of the One that promised He would be a stronghold and a bulwark against my enemies.
The sea rages against me, and the waters of the deep close over my head.
Never the less, I cry out for Him, I cry for Yahweh.
He shepherds the stars, and the universe can fit in the palm of His hand. He stretches out His fingertips and they catch the edge of all that exists.
My voice sounds in His ears; and He is with me. Yahweh Tsabaoth catches me in His battle-scarred hands; between the chamberings of my heart He is there.
The Bear and the Hunter, they watch in awe as the One who Numbers the Hairs on my head, the One that holds the beats of my heart, it is He who opens His mouth against the troubles that surround me.
At the sound of His voice, the fears tremble and melt like wax. When He sights my tormentor, all of hell clamors for mercy, but there is none found in Him for those that have set themselves up as my enemies.
He can bind the beautiful Pleiades in between His fingers,
and the breath of His mouth created all the starry host.
This is the One who is my Dread Champion, this is Yahweh Roi who leaves those safe in His house, and comes into the mud and muck where I have strayed, to lift me on His shoulders and carry me where I could not go myself.
My enemies fall before Him like the tail of a comet, like a dying sun they can not sustain themselves against my Abba. He sends the doubts and fears into the sea of forgetfulness; and tramples the accusations of others under His feet.
As I curl up in the comfort of His presence, the scent of wood shavings mixed with spikenard fill my nostrils, and I hear His heart beating beneath my ear
I love you.
Bible verses & passages that inspired my Psalm:
1 Samuel 22
1 Chron 16:26
1 Chron 29:11
The names of the LORD sited here in the transliteration of Hebrew are:
Elohim= God (hinting at the Trinity in its plural nature but singular usage)
Yahweh Roi= The LORD my Shepherd
Yahweh Tsabaoth=The LORD of Hosts
The images pictured are public domain images from the Hubble space telescope and feature: